The Duggars: WTF

Out of sheer boredom and lack of options, I watched an episode of 17 Kids and Counting on TLC last night. In the course of an hour, I learned quite a bit about this large family (apparently they let God decide the size of their family. Come on, people. God's not gonna give you a "how to" when it comes to birth control. That's why God invented sex education.) Any-hoo, here's a quick overview of my Duggar-Discoveries:

1. It's OK to change a typical spelling of a name so that it starts with a J in order to continue with a stupid tradition. Sorry, Jinger. 

2. There is someone out there manufacturing "modest swimwear" for hyper-conservatives like these folks. Not that any other family out there needed to be this neurotic about modesty. Let's face it, with 17 kids, the Duggars alone could keep this company in business. I just felt sorry for the poor little ones suffering in the heat in these suits.

3. There actually exists, brace yourselves, a CREATION MUSEUM. Here are some "highlights" from the website:

Walk Through Biblical History

This walk through history is the centerpiece of the Creation Museum and features amazing scientific and biblical answers for the world we live in today.

This one-way, self-guided tour begins at the Canyon Entrance as you enjoy viewing a dinosaur excavation! Everyone has the same facts, but we don’t all have the same starting points. Using the Bible as your starting point, prepare to travel back 6,000 years to the dawn of creation as you enjoy the Six Days Theater. Witness the true time line of the universe unfold through the 7 C’s of History. The final three C’s of Christ, Cross, and Consummation provide a powerful finale to our centerpiece in the Last Adam Theater—illuminating God’s redemptive plan throughout history.

Golly Gee, Jedediah! 6,000 WHOLE years?!?! Wow, I wish the dinosaurs were still with us today like they were with our ancestors...

Special Effects Theater

Featuring Men in White

(22 minutes)

Wendy has questions and the Men in White have answers. Come in and experience the sights, sounds, and thrills of the Bible and science in our unforgettable Special Effects Theater. Prepare to believe. You won’t want to miss this amazing show, included with general admission.

Yes...It IS important to further emphasize the superiority of "White Men." What ever would we do without their vast array of Biblical and "Scientific" knowledge?

I think the worst part about this particular portion of the episode was listening to all of the kids' testimonials. Of course, they're home-schooled, so they've never even heard the "other" side. We heretical Evolution-ers would have quite the influence on the Duggar angels.

4. This family is genuinely loving and caring. 

But so is my family. They left their family size up to God. My parents used some kind of birth control, but would never say God wasn't a factor in their lives. I'm a spiritual person who believes in God, but I also believe the Creation story in the Bible is a lovely fable. They would probably consider me to be immodest and lewd...ok, I haven't got an argument there, but I'm a pretty good person. 

I guess to each his own. These people aren't hurting anyone, and I suppose I'm being pretty damned judgmental (which, let's face it, is what I'm trying to make them out to be) but is it bad that they just creep me out? I want to take sweet little Jinger and some of the others and show them how life is on the other side. I know that it all boils down to trying to live good lives. They do it their way, I do it mine. I haven't heard them make any disturbing comments about other religions, premarital sex, homosexuality, abortion, etc. but I feel like I know what they would have to say on all these subjects and I'm pre-judging them to be judgmental. Oops. But seriously, why do they get to be on television? I've considered that there is a severe lack in "morality" on TV these days, but I just monumentally disagree with this way of living. TLC didn't ask me, though. 

Harumph. I have so much to say on this topic, but now I'm talking in circles and missing a mini-marathon of the better family. I'm referring, of course, to the fabulous Jon and Kate Plus 8. 

Reasons to be happy on Thursday, March 12, 2009

1. I skipped Directing I to get all of my RMRT stuff finished, finalized and mailed.
2. I went the wrong way down a one way in a town I've been living in for four years while I was trying to find the Macon County Sheriff's Office. Luckily there was a cop right there who pulled me over (well, I pulled over in anticipation of his pulling me over) laughed with me at the whole situation, and walked me to the sheriff's department himself.
3. Finished my Seagull analysis...12 pages, thank you very much, and I never want to look at it again. I'm fully ready to play Arkadina when the time comes...in 20 years.
4. Watched the progress of the Acting 2 students for whom I TA. I'm like a proud mother sometimes, I swear.
5. I finished writing the newest, hippest version of the Sleeping Beauty tale with my dear friend Joel. I think we're pretty damn brilliant...at the very least, we're clever.
6. I accepted the role of Ghost of Christmas Past for the Midwest Tour of Nebraska Theatre Caravan's A Christmas Carol. Two professional gigs nailed down.
7. Thanks to above reality, am beginning to feel more ready and confident about stepping out of the Milli-Bubble and making my childhood dreams a reality.
8. Making corny statements like "making my childhood dreams a reality."
9. This time tomorrow, I'll be in my comfy home in Des Moines, for my very last official spring break.

All in all, a good day.

This is just glorious

Spring has officially arrived, and I refuse to admit that it's only early March and it could potentially snow again any day. Right now it's 63 degrees and sunny. The sky is the bluest blue I've seen in ages, and I'm going to bask, bask I tell you. The gloriousness moved in Friday morning, and when I strolled leisurely to campus I walked past groups of jocks and their girlfriends playing bags with plastic cups of what I can only assume was Natty Ice. The SAEs were gathered on their porch, blaring their music and laughing. As I crossed Main Street and took in the beautiful view of Shilling and its sprawling front yard, more students were tossing frisbees or laying out in the newly green grass. I walked into Shilling, and headed to Nue Mue to get my daily dose of theatre major love and gossip only to discover it empty. "How silly of me," I thought. "Why on earth would we be inside?" I skipped easily past Einstein's and out to the back of Shilling where my beloved friends were chilling joyously on the steps of the ashtray or playing four-square with our new yellow smiley face ball.

Then, I stopped short, feeling that familiar catch in my throat. It hit me like a ton of bricks that this is the last "first day of spring" I'll have at Millikin. Sure, we'll be hanging out on those steps by the quad for the rest of the year, but there's something so thrilling about that first day. I was knocked out of my nostalgic haze by Mike screaming my name from the four square "field," and smiled as I took my seat next to everyone else on the spectator steps.

I realize that I'm a senior, and I've been having these moments sporadically all year. When I went to see the opening of "The Spitfire Grill" on Wednesday, it came at the end of the first act when I discovered that it was the last Mainstage I'd see here. I can't even think about what will happen to me when Romeo and Juliet rolls around. I'm writing my pieces for Un Bit, and all of them seem to be somehow related to being a senior, graduation, or adulthood. I need to snap out of it and get some funny going, stat. It's just so strange. I couldn't wait to graduate high school. As much as I made the best of everything and had a great time in choir and drama and all that, in the end, I couldn't leave soon enough.

I don't want to stay in college forever. I'm so excited to step out and stretch my legs, and I know I'm ready. But I've grown and changed so much in four years surrounded by this little school and the family I've made for myself in it. I'm moving to Chicago where I know I'll have a great little pocket of about half of that family, but the thought of not seeing the New Yorkers or the Minneapolis-ers every single day is something I don't think I'm ready to face yet. I am fully aware of how wretched I am at staying in touch with people. I never do it on purpose. Busy times happen, and when I realize I haven't seen/spoken with someone in ages, I'm afraid to even make the step. My high school insecurities about friends flood back in, and I worry they don't want to hear from me. I'm not that same little girl, though, who HAD to be completely confident and independent because I didn't think anybody really genuinely wanted me around. These people, these amazing people in my life are truly family. It's like that first time I referred to going "home" after class instead of going "back to the dorm/apartment." Despite the little fights, the unnecessary gossiping, whatever, we love each other. And we will always be there for each other.

I'm rambling and starting to not make sense, and I have to go to rehearsal. I've turned this glorious day into a melancholy one, and now I have to go mourn the death of my daughter. I'll end happily, though. I signed my contract for Rocky Mountain Rep today, and I CAN NOT WAIT to spend my summer doing theatre in the Rockies.

Huzzah and happy days!